Rob Zombie Turns To Crowd-Sourcing

Rob Zombie has his virtual tin cup out, looking for spare change to fund his next movie, the horror film 31. Here's what Zombie had to say about the film and why he's turned to crowd-sourcing.

Welcome to my next film. It is called 31. It is the story of five random people kidnapped on the five days leading up to Halloween and held hostage in a place called Murder World. While trapped inside this man-made Hell they must fight to survive playing the most violent game known to man...a game called 31.

31 has no rules. 31 has no boundaries. It is ever so simple. Do whatever you can do to kill your opponent before they kill you. Keep this up for 12 hours and freedom is yours.

Who are the opponents? Well...a group of vile, filthy, blood-thirsty clowns known as THE HEADS. They come in all shapes and sizes and each grows nastier than the last.

What kind of film is this you ask? It is a fast paced, mean dirty film for those who like it rough. Get ready for a sick piece of celluloid! This is some hardcore business for the blood-thirsty gore hounds.

I’m crowd funding because I realize that it’s an incredible opportunity to engage the fans. They’ve always been the most important thing for me because, with metal and horror, the fans aren’t just fans – it’s their life, their lifestyle. They live and breathe it, as I do, and any way that you can bring the people that are as passionate about it as you are into the process is a win-win for everybody.Get on board! Get involved! Be part of this horrifying business! The world of horror needs you!

The world of horror needs me! Where's my checkbook! Sigh. Unfortunately, as a poorly paid writer, I'm lucky to have money for crank - I mean "inspiration dust" - let alone a spare roll of nickles for a movie about "vile, blood-thirsty clowns" (aren't they all?). I'll just wait for the movie to come out. Zombie's movies are hit (Devil's Rejects) and miss (House of 1000 Corpses) but this does sound like an interesting idea.

If you want to help out, go here and drop some coin.

There is some pretty sweet concept art that has been released. You can find it after the break. But, be careful; they're some boobies on display. And we don't want to shock the children, do we?

Next Film Series - Westerns...With A Twist.

With Zombie-A-Thon over, what will The Last Great Roadshow focus on next? How about Westerns. But not just any Westerns. We'll be looking at Spaghetti Westerns. We'll be looking at Sci-Fi Westerns. We'll be looking at Horror Westerns. Basically, anything that has the vibe of the frontier, of tough men and women hacking out a living on the edge of civilization. Of places where law and order come from a stout heart and a quick gun. And, we'll check out movies that play with the genre conventions, transporting them to different times and settings.

Zombie-A-Thon #8 - Planet Terror (2007) - With Peg-Leg Spoilers

When Grindhouse came out, I managed to see it not only on the big screen, but actually sitting in balcony seat in a classic movie palace. To me, that's about as good as you can get, short of seeing the movie at a drive-in. While I thought Tarantino's segment Death Proof was okay, I enjoyed Robert Rodrigeuz's Planet Terror. Overflowing with gore and goo, featuring over-the-top action and buoyed up by Rose McGowen looking exceptionally hot, I've gone back to see Planet Terror a few times since its release. But, it has been a while. Does it still hold up?

Synopsis

Rose McGowen (Cherry) is fed up with the life of a pole-dancer. She decides to leave the backwoods Texas town where she is living. At nearby military base, Colonel Muldoon (Bruce Willis) is meeting with arms dealer Abby (Naveen Andrews) to obtain DC-2, a nerve agent that he and his men need to survive. Without regular doses, exposure to DC-2 turns its victims into flesh eating zombies. In short order, the nerve agent escapes into the atmosphere and zombies overrun the countryside. Various characters show up, all basically bundles of cliches and one-liners. Cherry loses a leg, and replaces it with an M-16. There's a subplot about a brotherly rivalry between Michael Biehn (the town sheriff) and Jeff Fahey (restaurant owner) over a secret barbeque sauce. There is another about a hot blonde bisexual doctor (Marley Shelton), her one-time lover (Fergie, in little more than a cameo and dead soon after she is introduced) and her dick husband (the awesome Josh Brolin). We get violent twin babysitters, Freddy Rodríguez as former secret agent and current bad-ass Wray, gratuitous Tom Savini, and some gross medical photos, including one of penis with massive white pustules on it (don't watch this movie while eating!). In the end, much of the world is destroyed, but Cherry - now sporting a Gatling gun on her stump - has gathered together a band of survivors and is hanging out on a beach in Mexico. The End.

Analysis

How do you have a strip club with no nudity? Actually, how do you make a movie that's supposed to be a grindhouse film and not have nudity?

Bruce Willis is under there...someplace.

That question aside, Planet Terror superficially captures the gory, gonzo feel of Italian horror films like Nightmare City, Zombie and City of the Living Dead. The blood packs must have been loaded with extra squibs, since every bullet hit results in a fountain of red. The zombies are masses of pulsing, oozing sores, with limbs that tear off easily, and, in the case of Quentin Tarantino's rapist soldier, a melting penis. If you like cartoonishly graphic violence, you will like the effects in this film.

Quentin has looked...better.

The actions scenes are well done. In particular there is a great knife fighting sequence with Wray mowing down zombies in a hospital (see below). Director Robert Rodriguez delivers a good looking splatter film. He keeps the gross-out fun rolling along at a steady pace. At no point does the film slow down, and there is enough variation in the action and effects to keep the visuals interesting. The acting is fine. As mentioned before, the characters are collections of quirks and one-liners. While usually this would be an issue, for this kind of movie it's appropriate. By the end of the film - where Cherry has an assault rifle for a leg and characters are using helicopter blades like a weedwhacker to kill a horde of zombies (done less humorously in 28 Weeks Later) you're pretty much ready to accept anything.

There are some gross-out moments (like Abby's testicle collection) that don't work as well as others. And, Marley Shelton seems to not have gotten the joke, delivering blandness in a film that demands over-the-top performances. The film is too jokey and excessive to be scarey, serving more as a showcase for splatter effects. It's unfortunate that we don't get a shower scene (come on, ladies, you're covered in gore; you need to scrub each other down) and the movie starts to wear out it's welcome near the end.

Notes

The film this most reminds me of is Umberto Lenzi's Nightmare City. The tone of City is more serious and it is a traditional horror film. However, it has the same gonzo feel to the violence and a similar plot (except the zombies in City are victims of radiation, not a nerve gas). Even the names of the films seem to reference each other. Where is Nightmare City located? On Planet terror, of course.

In keeping with the "grindhouse" feel, the film has print damage and is missing a reel, so we get a jump in the action. This is pretty clever and is used to gloss over what would've been another long action scene where one wasn't needed.

Cherry when she still had two legs.

The film was billed as an homage to grindhouse cinema of the Seventies. But, what is a grindhouse film? The term refers to exploitation movies that were shown in second-tier (or worse) theaters in certain areas of major cities. Often, these theaters were run-down and in rough areas, something that added to their transgressive appeal. The films themselves offered sex and violence not yet in mainstream films, although many grindhouse movies promised more than they delivered. Prior to the Seventies, these kind of films would have been seen as b-movies and drive-in fodder (although they would not have been, in general, as explicit). After the Seventies, the home video revolution wiped out most of these theaters. Some elements of grindhouse/exploitation cinema went mainstream (the graphic violence in particular). The kind of low-budget fare previously offered in grindhouse theaters went into the straight-to-video market, where it remains to this day, although video now can mean Netflix, SyFy, online streaming, VOD, etc. By the end of the Eighties, it would be very difficult, if not impossible, to find the kind of movies that we think of as grindhouse films on a big screen. So, does a movie that got widespread release, featured name actors still in the midst of successful careers and had a budget of $53 million really a grindhouse film? Or, is it just a big budget zombie splatter film? I would say the latter. Quite frankly, it is too self-aware and to aggressively an homage to qualify as the kind of film that it wants to be. The performances in grindhouse movies are often excessive or laughable because of poor acting, poor writing, no budget, a compressed shooting schedule or all four. Here, they are very calculated. The gore in the grindhouse films was meant to titillate, to show audience something they couldn't get in mainstream films. That is not the case with Planet Terror. After years of high-intensity violence in films like Commando and Die Hard and splatter in even high-budget films like Hannibal, exploding blood packs don't have the impact they may have had in 1975. The movie teases at nudity, but fails to deliver. While not ever exploitation film had nudity, it is a cheat to open a movie in a strip club and, even if McGowan isn't going to doff her top, not even have a naked extra.

And, Cherry with a bit more boom-boom.

Finally, and most importantly, I think that Rodriguez misses why exploitation/grindhouse movies still have an appeal. They are mostly low-budget affairs, but you have to admire the creativity, the effort, that people with limited time, resources (and in many cases, talent) were able to muster. These movies have a manic energy about them, the sense that filmmakers who found themselves with more on-screen freedom than before, just went a little nuts (in a good way). Planet Terror for all it's blood and guts, is a very tame, controlled affair. It may have been better to give Rodriguez a $5 million budget, a 2 week shooting schedule and an actress who wouldn't mind an explicit shower scene.

How does it fair as a zombie film? Pretty good. It does not have the dour charms of Romero's more serious horror/social commentary films. And, it is not a relentless thriller like28 Days Later. It lacks even the shallow drama of action-horror films like the Dawn of the Dead remake. Its humor is not the the more thoughtful brand found in Shaun of the Dead or even the alien-zombie flick Night of the Creeps. Like the Italian zombie films cited earlier, it really has more to do with stripping the zombie film down to it's visual essence; gore, gore and more gore. And in this aspect, it succeeds. The gore, however, is not the painfully realistic dismembering of Day of the Dead or the sad, slow decay of the protagonist in Contracted. It is so excessive that the film quickly because a Three Stooges film, an exercise in gruesome slapstick.

Verdict

Planet Terror is entertaining, if you like bloody horror movies. But, along with it's fellow Grindhouse feature Death Proof it fails to capture the spirit or energy of the movies it is an homage to. If you want to see a real grindhouse zombie movie, check out Nightmare City, Lucio Fulci's Zombie or even Cannibal Apocalypse. Still, Planet Terror is worth watching. Check it out.

Here's your trailer.

And, here's the knife fight I mentioned.

Tech Stuff - Is USB Security Non-Existent?

Apparently so, according to security researchers Karsten Nohl and Jakob Lell. Although the idea that malicious code can be spread through devices like data-sticks is not new, these guys have developed a way to load malware into the firmware of the device, basically making it impossible to detect and protect against. And, it is not just data-sticks; since this method of attack using USB firmware, any USB device could be used to launch an attack. For more details, check out this Wired article. And trust no one.

Make-up Effects Legend Dick Smith Has Died

Dick Smith has died at age 92. I could write about all the amazing films that have featured his work, but images would be far more eloquent. Enjoy some of the magic that Smith gave us.

An example of his early work with the TV anthology Way Out. From the episode Soft Focus.

One of the forms of Jeff Bridges in Altered States.

Old F. Murray Abraham in Amadeus.

More old age make-up, this time Dustin Hoffman in Little Big Man.

A disturbing effect from Ghost Story.

A damned soul from The Sentinel in which Christina Raines finds out her apartment building in New York City is a portal to Hell. Features a lot of weird, unsettling make-up from Smith.

And, finally, a behind-the-scenes shot of Smith and Linda Blair from The Exorcist and the finished work. It is amazing what he did with latex, imagination and talent.

Sony...WTF?

The idea of a video game streaming service offering all the PlayStation titles you know and love (or will learn to love)? Hell yeah! I love PlayStation. I love Netflix. I love Reese's Peanut butter Cups. Combine them all and you should get awesomeness. Also known as PlayStation Now.

Seems like a no-brainer. Instead of buying physical media, I can just stream or download a game until I get sick of it. Unfortunately, as pointed out in this article at Kotaku the price model is deranged, as if the guys at Sony said, "Let's take an idea that should make us a billion dollars and shot it in the head." Maybe that's a little too violent; but still, check this out. You currently rent the game based on the amount of time you want it. Okay. But, in the examples given, you can by the games for the same (or less) than you can rent them. For example, you can rent Guacamelee for$15 for a 90-days; but, that's how much it costs to buy it on Amazon. And for Final Fantasy XIII a 90-day rental costs $13 more than it costs to buy the game.

Apparently, there will be some sort of subscription service some time in the future. But, for now, if you are launching a new service and you have the backing of a company worth $148 billion dollars and you have the potential for creating a service that will allow you to make even more money, why screw it up with a moronic pricing model? Particularly since Sony is currently charging people to beta test the service, which does not generate a lot of warm feelings.

Poster Of The Day - Deathsport (1978)

Deathsport was churned out in the late-Seventies by Roger Corman's New World Pictures. It had a pretty good trailer (see below) and I vaguely remember some TV spots for it that seemed neat. Of course, I was an 8-year-old when this came out, so the idea of laser-armed motorcycles was totally "boss," to use the slang of the time. I'm like a living fossil suddenly.

For a movie full motor cycles, laser blasts and explosions, it is surprisingly sluggish, even boring. It does have the smoking hot Claudia Jennings in it and she does drop her knickers. We also get David Carradine in a leather loincloth (eww).

In keeping with many Corman films, the poster is pretty bad ass. Ok, we do get barbarian guy-butt in a Speedo, which is not cool...although it is an ass...hahahaha. Ah, some days I kill me.

The poster does promise action (which there is, even if it's not well done), high-powered motor cycle death machines (eh, dirt bikes with plastic thingies stuck to them) and a glimpse at a depressing future, where the only entertainment on the floating city are gladiatorial games (quite true...except for the floating city part). Seeing that poster with the eyes of a kid again, one who hasn't seen the movie, I know why it appealed. The action is front and center. I want to see who the biker barbarian is shooting at. The motorcycle appealed to my kiddie brain, recently basted in 35 viewings of Star Wars. Plus, I was in a Robert E. Howard phase, so anything with barbarians seemed cool, even if they are barbarians of the future. The poster does have some problems. The title obscures the action and would probably be better either over or under the central image. Also, the perspective seems a little weird, but the image is pretty kinetic, so that isn't a big drawback.

Claudia Jennings, hottest future barbarian ever.

So, would adult me go see this movie? Well, I own it, so, yeah, I guess so. It's a strange film. It has all the elements to be a fun B-movie - decent actors, hot lead willing to get naked, lots of action - but it never really comes together in an entertaining whole. Still, love the poster.

New Interstellar Trailer Out

Chris Nolan's Interstellar looks cool as hell. While it might get a little schmaltzy (that's a word, look it up) the visuals are pretty impressive. Also, Nolan has shown that he makes amazing films. So, I have a high degree of confidence in this. Also, I like "big concept" science fiction. Check out the trailer below.

The Dead 2 Coming Out On Disc

I really liked The Dead (2010), a moderate-budget zombie movie filmed in Ghana and Burkina Faso. It benefited from it's unusual location, good performances and sticking with the classic Romero zombies; slow, relentless, one bite is all you need, shot-'em-in-the-head-type zombies. It was successful enough to warrant a sequel (The Dead 2), which I was unable to catch in the theaters (I don't even know if it was released anywhere in my area). However, it us coming out on DVD and Blu-Ray from Anchor Bay on 16 September. I'll be picking.

Set in India, it looks like the action has been ramped up, while still keeping the same basic plot (foreigner trying to make is way through a zombie-infested country). Check out the red-band trailer below.

Short Attention Span Review - Los Ultimos Dias (2013) - Mild Spoilers

What would happen if the entire human race suddenly developed a fatal for of agoraphobia and was confined to buildings and tunnels? That's what Los ultimos dias (The Last Days) takes as its premise. When I first saw this on Netflix and read the description "Stuck at the office? They've been there for months. Going out for some fresh air will get you killed" I thought it was a dark comedy. Well, it is dark, but it's not a comedy.

Marc (Quim Gutiérrez) is a programmer on the verge of losing his job thanks to efficiency expert Enrique (José Coronado). At home is his girlfriend, Julia (Marta Etura) who is, unbeknownst to him, pregnant. As the strange malady overtakes the entire world, Marc is stuck in his office tower. After three months, he and his colleagues manage to tunnel from their underground parking garage into the subway system. Marc and Enrique to embark on a quest to reach their loved ones, Julia and Enrique's father. Using the subways and sewers of Barcelona, they see how people have adapted to the new world. Some have turned into predators, while others retain their humanity. Will Marc be reunited with Julia? Will anyone ever be able to go outside again?

Los ultimos dias is greatly helped by the acting of the two leads Gutiérrez and Coronado. The actors do a great job of portray fairly complex characters who develop as the movie unfolds. The supporting cast is pretty good, although no one stays around long enough to be more than a one-note character. The image of a city slowly deteriorating is ably handled by the effects team. The camera work is good; in particular the use of light and shadows in the underground trek is shows how to use light to create interesting visual textures.

There are problems. First, keep in mind this is what I call "soft" sci-fi; an example of this kind of SF are Ray Bradbury's works. The ultimate explanation for what is happening has to be interpolated from the final scenes and doesn't make much "scientific" sense; however, it is an interesting message (which I won't give away). There are some plot holes/moments of suspension of disbelief, most revolving around how long people could survive if trapped inside of buildings. While I won't say where Julia is, the idea that she could've lasted there for over 3 months is hard to swallow. There are actually many moments like this is the film - like a bizarre moment involving a church and a bear - where you have to just shrug and say "okay, I guess I'll buy that." If the acting weren't as good or the story as interesting, this would definitely lead me to conclude "sloppy writing, don't bother." However, this is a touching, if grim story, and it is so well acted and executed visually, with enough things to say about human nature and the relationship of man to his world and to technology that you can accept some of the hand-waving needed to get over the plot holes.

Great film. Check it out.

Happy Trailers - The Next Hobbit-Related Waste Of Time

I like the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Not every moment of it. I don't mind the deviations from the books. I do mind scenes that add nothing to the story or, in the case of the final film and the resolution of the Battle of Minas Tirith, makes me wonder if Peter Jackson even knows how to tell a dramatic story. Resorting to a Deus ex machina is never a good idea. Problems aside, these three films still make up a fun fantasy epic.

The Hobbit? Not so much. The Desolation of Smaug was terrible, an exercise in bloated storytelling and self-indulgence. Jackson's desire to turn a children's story into some kind of action/drama epic was a mistake. His instability to create action scenes that don't look like they were pulled from a video game, the moronic love story, the lack of coherent characters...just a terrible waste of money and effort on the part of the creative team and of money and time for the viewers.

The Battle of Five Armies looks like more of the same. Video game physics. Action scenes turned up to eleven. Melodramatics. Unneeded efforts to hammer it home that this story takes place before LOTR. It just looks bad. But, your mileage may be different. Check out the trailer below. If you enjoy it, and liked the other Hobbit films, no judgement here. I mean, I love It! The Terror from Beyond Space! in which the costume head of the titular monster was too small, so the stunt man's chin is sticking out of the mouth and made up to look like a tongue, giving the impression of an alien giving his victims a raspberry, so I have no right to tell people their taste is...oh, whatever. If you like the Hobbit films, you're on crack. You hear me! Crack!!!!!

Neat Time Lapse Video - Above LA

This is an absolutely hypnotic time lapse video of Los Angeles. The filmmaker, Chris Pritchard, explains his motivation for the film;

Above LA is a love letter to Los Angeles and showcases my favorite way to view the city - from above. Whether on a rooftop, a hill, or a mountain, getting above the grind of the city allows you to appreciate it in a new way. Once you get even slightly above, the views and sounds begin to change dramatically. Getting above it all has been instrumental in helping me get to know and appreciate Los Angeles. This piece was produced off and on over the course of two years, and the clips selected for this film are only a small percentage of what I captured during my quest to take in the city from different locations and in new ways. Some of the locations featured are popular and easy to access, others require some searching and hiking, and some are heavily restricted. But I encourage everyone - lifelong Angelenos, transplants, visitors - to hit the trails, drive the mountain roads, find a reason to get on top of a high-rise. From the basin to the valley, this city offers so many opportunities to rise above and look down. Never stop exploring.

Check it out.

Happy Trailers - Mad Max, Fury Road (2015)

I'm a fan of the first two Mad Max films. The third one has some neat moments, but is mostly a watered-down mess. When I heard George Miller was returning to the world of Max Rockatansky, I was guardedly optimistic. Casting Tom Hardy as Max did nothing for me, since I have mixed feelings about his skill as an actor. I disliked him in Star Trek: Nemesis and The Dark Knight Rises, but have seen him in other movies, like RocknRolla, where he was fine.

Now that the first trailer is out, I can say...not bad. The trailer itself is really nothing but action shots - although, given what we see, it almost looks like the plot has elements of Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone in it. If you've seen that movie...well, you have earned a geek-point for today.

Anyway, we have action, car crashes, explosions, super-sandstorms, more car crashes, hot chicks looking pensive, unpleasant tattoo experiences (would you really was time looking for tat ink in post-apocalyptic world?), more car crashes, guys on poles snatching chicks, steamrolled motorcycles...basically, two and a half minutes of action money-shots. It gives the impression of a film experience like The Road Warrior. If it can come even close to equally that movie - still one of the best action films ever made - then I'll be happy movie-goer.

Here are the trailers for Fury Road and The Road Warrior. Enjoy.

Update: I can't believe I missed the Cars that Ate Paris visual reference the first time around. I lose half a geek point for that. Anyway, trailers.

Mad Max: Fury Road

The Road Warrior

Godzilla 2 Comic-Con News

I liked elements of Gareth Edwards' Godzilla, ultimately recommending it, even with some serious flaws. It was pretty clear, based on the business it did, that a sequel would be coming. Some news out of San Diego Comic-Con makes me hopeful that sequel will be better than the first one. First, I hope the Edwards and his creative team learn from the mistakes of Godzilla and come up with better characters and show a bit more monster stomping action. Second, the news from Comic-Con...three words...Mothra, Rodan, Gidorah! Yep, it looks like a sequel, probably four or five years away, will feature some of Godzilla's co-stars from the Toho movies. This could be all kinds of awesome.

Short Attention Span Review - Banshee Chapter (2013) - With Drug Influenced Spoilers

I read about this film in Rue Morgue, checked out the trailer on YouTube (below) and thought "looks pretty good." Sure, it has found footage elements - which normally make me want to swallow my own tongue - but anything dealing with weird pharmacology and extra-dimensional entities is worth checking out. I am happy I did.

Banshee Chapter follows Anne (Katia Winter) who is investigating the disappearance of college friend who, in turn, was looking into CIA drug experiments. Her friend, James (True Blood's Michael McMillan) was able to obtain samples of one experimental drug - DMT-19. He takes it...and something horrible happens. Anne's investigations lead to her discovering that the drug is not an hallucinogenic or truth serum...it is a substance that reconfigures the brain into a receiver. A receiver for something not of this world.

If you are familiar with the Lovercraft story "From Beyond" or the movie by the same name, you'll have a pretty good idea of what's happening. In fact, the story is name-checked by one character, Thomas Blackburn (Ted Levine channeling the shade of Hunter S. Thompson). The movie is a mix of found footage (some video camera footage from both James and Anne, as well as recovered footage of CIA tests in the Sixties) and standard filming. This leads to some confusion in shots, as it is not always clear what is "found footage" and what isn't. There are two ways to look at this; either it is just sloppy film-making or it is very purposeful. If it is the latter, which I think it is, I think it is what the extra-dimensional entities are seeing. I'm reading something into the film; but it seems tightly constructed enough that I assume this blurring between "found footage" and traditional visual narrative has a story driven purpose.

The acting is uniformly good. The effects are minimal and effective. The sound design, particularly the short-wave transmissions (based on numbers stations) that people under the influence of DMT-19 hear, is unsettling. Many of the ideas presented are both provocative and disturbing. The story appeals to me, although I'm predisposed to like stories about secret government programs, mind-altering drugs, Lovecraftian horrors and secret history.

The biggest problem is that, instead of trying to scare the audience, the filmmakers are content to startle them. I have an upcoming post about the difference between being afraid and being startled, but, suffice to say, in this film there are lots of scenes of stuff jumping at the camera or out of corners. This does cause the viewer to jump; but that's not because it's scarey. It's because there is sudden noise and movement. That can be fun - like the thrill of riding a roller-coaster - but ultimately, it's cheaper and less satisfying than an image or idea that scares you and stays with you.

Also, there are a couple of plot points that require some hand-waving to accept. Nothing too serious; but some tighter writing could have addressed them.

Anyway, this is a well-made, creepy movie. It has some rough edges, but is well-worth watching.

Happy Trailers - Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

I tried to read Fifty Shades of Grey (back off, it was research for a novel) and just couldn't get through it. I've written...um...read...um...heard of...better random Interwebs porn. But, since the book sold fifty zillion copies to masturbating mommies, it is being turned into a big, terrible movie.

At least, if the trailer is any indication.

I guess the leads (Dakota Johnson (bonus: she already has a good pornstar name), Jamie Dornan) are attractive enough, although, we get to see Dornan without a shirt on, but we do not see Dakota's boobs. i call blatant sexism. Come on Hollywood, one standard for all.

Anyway, we get some dialogue delivered in breathless style, like everyone is taking the stairs. Sexy or asthmatic, your call. You do get the gist of what the movie is about. Young girl, slightly older rich guy, glider rides (what, no ponies?) secret sex dungeon, tied up Dakota faking an orgasm. The end. What it looks like - with the long glances and tight close-ups on blandly pretty people - is a Twilight movie only without vampires. Yes, I know the source book started out as Twilight fanfic. The movie, however, did not have to follow that same visual style as those dreadful movies. But, since this film is meant solely to drain money from your wallets, it makes sense it would be as commercial as possible in all ways.

The Fifty Shades trailer is great for one reason; it does tell you everything you want to know about the film. If this blahness is your thing, then you should enjoy the film. Otherwise, the trailer screams - sorry, tells you breathlessly- to "steer clear." Is it too much to ask to have a sex film (which is what this is) that actually seems...well...sexy? Hot? Not liable to put me to sleep?

Well, If you want to see a great dom-sub movie, check out Secretary.

Hey, we are informed by the trailer Beyonce has made an "exclusive version of 'Crazy in Love'" for the movie. You get to hear part of it during the trailer. And, it is as pop-generic as you'd expect. So, if you like that kind of thing I guess this is a bonus. For me, it reinforces just how much this film is firmly aimed at being profitable and forgettable "product."

Hell On Wheels...Back On...Wait For It...Track (Some Frontier Spoilers)

Hell on Wheels isn't great, but it is entertaining. It has a Deadwood vibe about it, without the uniformly great cast or complex characters. But, it does have Colm Meaney and a host of okay actors. Season One was good, setting up decent conflicts and providing a lot of story options. Season Two, however, was terrible. It was a lot of random violence, lack of motivation for actions, everyone behaving like borderline psychopaths and a terrible death for Lily (Dominique McElligott). It's like the writers decided what made Deadwood popular was mud and violence and went with that.

Season Three, which I watched on Netflix, is much better. Protagonist Bohanan (Anson Mount) has comprehensible motivation again. The entire season has a low-key, for a show called Hell on Wheels, but dramatically rich plot and there are not a lot of false moments for the characters. Subplots involving a missing baby, an angry Mormon and a bad end for one of the Brothers McGinnes are all well done. There are a few missteps. For example, I'm not certain what the purpose of new character, Louise Ellison (Jennifer Ferrin) a sort-of in-the-closet lesbian reporter from New York serves except to have, well, a sort-of in-the-closet lesbian reporter on the show. But, hey, maybe we'll get a lot of sweaty girl-on-girl action; come on, AMC, you can pander while trying to be late-Nineties edgy. Also, a certain character who is visibly pregnant at the end makes me wonder about the timeline for the whole season, which is not well defined. Also, she seems to become more pregnant with each scene, even one's that take place withing hours of each other. And, finally, were Mormons really a bunch of fanatical religious terrorists? Because that's kind of the impression given in the series.

Just to be clear, however, these are comparatively minor issues with an otherwise solid season of gritty Western entertainment. Check it out and see how a series can save itself from imploding by, surprise, telling good stories and creating well-rounded characters who have arcs.

Hope the show doesn't...derail...in Season Four.

New Trailer For Walking Dead

A new trailer for Season Five of The Walking Dead has been released to coincide with Comic-Con (wish I was there...sigh). Looks like a lot of zombie-killing badassery. Of course, there are some spoilerish bits, but nothing that you couldn't have guessed. Check it out.

The Manhattan Projects; Buy Now - Review Later.

Comixology is having a sale on The Manhattan Projects. Basically, it's a series about the secret science wars in an alternate mid-20th Century. The series is full of neat ideas and weird science. And I love the art by Nick Pitarra. I'll write up a series review later; but I'd recommend going over to Comixology while it's on sale. It's a great comic that any science fiction or alt-history fan will enjoy.

Check it out here.

New Half In The Bag Review - Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes (2014)

I enjoy the hell out of the stuff from Red Letter Media. A new Half in the Bag - they're main movie review video series - is out. This time around, they're looking at Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. There are spoilers, so don't watch the video if you haven't seen the movie yet.

How It Should Have Ended - Godzilla

The good people at How It Should Have Ended have taken on this year's Godzilla. Pretty funny. Check it out below.

Poster Of The Day - Zombie-A-Thon Edition - Dawn Of The Dead (1978)

Dawn of the Dead is a great movie. Characters with depth, a story that mostly makes sense, pacing that builds tension, bursts of action and violence, great practical effects (although the blue face on the zombies isn't that great) and some deftly handled social commentary.

And that poster! Freaking amazing. It is visually simple; but, it's minimalism is key of its appeal. The bold title font and color let's you know this is a hard hitting film. The abstract zombie head rising from the horizon is disturbing without being graphic. You know some bad is happening - why does the head have the mottled discoloration? Why is it being equated with the sun? Does it mean the film is going to show us a world where zombies have won the day? We don't have an image of what the zombies will look like, allowing us to mentally fill in the blanks.There is no visual example of the scope of the film, just the impression that it will be big. The tag line "When there's no more room in HELL the dead will walk the EARTH" is memorable and prominently place. Your gaze goes straight from the zombie head to the tag line, enhancing the impact of both. The only thing that detracts from the poster is the side bar, mentioning >Night of the Living Dead and Romero's name. While understandable from a marketing point of view, it detracts from the vertical lines and clear focus of the poster.

The poster is a classic example of conveying feeling and meaning without using complex images or giving away anything specifically from the film. One of my favorites.

Happy Trailers - The Devil's Rain (1975)

The Seventies were the heyday of Satan movies. Films like The Exorcist, The Omen, and The Omen 2 were big budget examples of demonic cinema. There were also a lot of low-budget films in this sub-genre, some good, some bad. Race with the Devil and The Car are examples of enjoyable low-budget Satan movie. At the other end of the spectrum are the amazingly titled but otherwise boring as...well, Hell...Satan's School for Girls and the horrible Italian rip-off of The Exorcist, Beyond the Door.

Somewhere in the middle is The Devil's Rain. The film is a mess as far as the story is concerned, with numerous plot holes. However, it does make good use of its Southwestern locations, has some great, mid-tier actors (Bill Shatner, Ernest Borgnine, Tom Skerritt), decent low-budget effects and a pretty good pace. In short, it's an acceptable drive-in movie (although it needs a shower scene with hottie Joan Prather). It entertains, gives us some nice images and a few mild scares and then wraps everything up in a fairly unsettling fashion. In short, it's worth seeing.

The trailer, however, does everything a trailer shouldn't. First, it starts with some cheesy paintings. Guys, we're in a movie, not at the Met. Then, it shows all of the effects money shots. Finally, it gives away the ending! So, why watch the 90 minute long movie when I can just watch a 3 minute long trailer that makes about as much sense?

Favorite quote form the trailer: "A melting Hell on Earth!"

Don't Have An Opinion In France

Apparently, having an opinion in France and sharing it online is cause for legal damages. This from The Independent:

A French food blogger has been fined thousands of euros and ordered to change the title of a negative review after a judge ruled that the piece appeared too prominently on Google. Ads by Google Caroline Doudet wrote the post titled “The place to avoid in Cap-Ferret: Il Giardino” in August 2013, with the review appearing fourth in searches for the restaurant’s name. The restaurant’s owners sued Ms Doudet six months later, arguing that the article was hurting their business and the judge ordered Ms Doudet to change the title of the blog and pay €2,500 (£2000) in damages and costs earlier this month.

This is insane. I read the review (well, a Google translation of it) and, while definitely negative, doesn't seem to extreme. Basically, the author says the service and food are bad. Okay...how is that worthy of a fine? How is any opinion offered on a for-free blog worthy of a fine? I don't know the laws in France that pertain to this - I assume the judge was acting withing the appropriate legal framework - but any country that allows this has problems.

A free society can't function if people are afraid to offer their opinions, whether on food, art, religion, politics, whatever. Even if your opinion is "x sucks! It sucks dead donkey balls" that should be okay. As long as your not writing (or saying) "I hate this restaurant; let's firebomb it" or something along those lines, then free speech should trump every other consideration.

You can read more at Eater.com and you can access the original article here.

Zombie-A-Thon #7 - Diary Of The Dead (2007) - With Found Spoiler Footage

George Romero created the modern zombie. Of course, other people were involved with Night of the Living Dead (1968) but Romero is recognized as the father of the zombie movie in particular and modern zombie fiction in general. His is vision of zombies - slow moving, flesh munching, hard to stop unless you "shoot 'em in the head" - is the de facto depiction in pop culture. Deviation from this - the fast moving zombies of the Dawn of the Dead (2004) remake - often lead to apoplectic fans, who declare that "that's not what zombies are like."

Romero has made other, non-zombie films (including two of my favorite low-budget films from the the Seventies The Crazies and Martin) but is best known for his six films featuring the undead. Night and Dawn of the Dead (1978) are generally recognized as classics of the horror genre. Day of the Dead (1985) was initially disliked by those who were not ready for its unrelentingly grim tone and dark, claustrophobic setting; however, over the years, there has been a lot of reassessing done and it is now seen in a much more favorable light. For my part, I loved it since I first saw it at a midnight showing at the 12 Oaks Mall in Novi, Michigan.

After a break of 20 years, Romero came back with Land of the Dead (2005), which has its moments, but has serious story and character problems. It did have a more "epic" feel than his previous films with multiple locations and a more wide-open feel. This is a nice change from isolated homes, shopping malls and underground bunkers. However, for his next two zombie films, Romero has gone back to smaller, more intimate (and lower budget) films.

Which brings us to tonight's feature, Diary of the Dead.

Synopsis

A group of film students are in an isolated forest shooting a horror movie for a class as the zombie apocalypse starts. As they try to survive, the director, Jason (Joshua Close) insists of filming everything that his happening. Along the way, they encounter a zombie infested hospital, a town run by heavily armed African-Americans, a deaf-mute, dynamite wielding Amish farmer and a group of rouge National Guardsmen. They make it to voice of reason (and narrator) Debra's (Michelle Morgan) home, only to find her family zombiefied. Finally, they arrive at rich kid Ripley's (Philip Riccio) home, where everything falls apart. Debra - hiding in the mansions panic room - uses the footage to make a movie The Death of Death and release it online. The fate of the survivors is let unknown, although things don't look very good. The end.

Analysis

I'll start with the "found footage" aspect of the movie. Normally, I dislike found footage movies. The conceits of the genre are generally used to hide bad effects, terrible acting, and threadbare production values. However, by setting this film up from the onset as a documentary Romero avoids some of the problems of plot and logic that mars many films in this sub-genre. As Debra says at the onset, "The film was shot with a Panasonic HDX-900 and an HBX-200. I did the final cut on Jason's laptop. I've added music occasionally for effect, hoping to scare you." There is a minimum of shaky cam - always good - and most of the action is shown clearly. Romero makes the weaknesses work.

There are some decent gore effects. The score sounds like something that a person would piece together on Garageband from clips, which works. The plot - small group trying to survive while documenting the disaster going on around them - is fine. There are some decent scenes - the hospital sequence is well done and tense, as is the finale.

However...the story, acting and dialogue are a mess. Starting with the cast, the highlight is Amy Lalonde as Tracy, a tough little gal from Texas. She seems to be enjoying herself. No one else is very good, varying between flat and somnambulist. So, strike one. The dialogue is a collection of cliches and slogans. One or two is okay...but no one speaks the way these people do. This is not uncommon in movies; however, when the film is supposed to be a documentary and when the script is unrelenting in the use of catch-phrase dialogue, it becomes annoying. So, strike two. The story isn't horrible; however, there are some serious flaws. There are a few moments of humor that don;t work. Of course, you can use humor in a horror film; but, the jokes and sight gags better be funny. Here, they seem out-of-place, like something a writer would have in a first draft - because it sounded amusing - but one re-reads would realize just slows down the pace of the film. There are moments of supposed tension which are anything but that. In particular, there are two moments with protagonist, narrator and film maker Debra, where she is supposed to be in danger. One, is in the town with the African-Americans where she badgers the leader into giving them supplies. The setup is that she won't leave, that he'll have to kill her, if he doesn't give in. Well, he has to give in, because she is alive to make the movie. The same applies when she arrives at her home and a) tells everyone to leave her there and b) she is attacked by her zombie family.

Romero likes to use his movies to comment on social, political and cultural issue. I applaud this. Movies don't always have to be about some great issue or make some deep statement about life, the universe and everything. When they are, however, it adds another dimension to the story and makes for a more interesting (although not always better) viewing. While never the most subtle of allegorical story-tellers, Romero here is hammering the viewer over the head with his message: that the spread of info technology has made getting to the truth harder, that "those damn kids" (as one character says "blogger, hackers, kids") have taken over for the old guardians of the truth, the professional media. Because e the message is delivered in such a ham-fisted manner it doesn't have the impact that Romero obviously thinks it does. While not as bad as Land of the Dead in this regard (where the message is so dumb and presented so poorly that it detracts from the film) Diary does not work as a social commentary film, even though that is what Romero wanted from it.

Verdict

Diary is not a bad film; it's just mediocre. Romero delivers some good gore, some good jolts and some arresting images. However, he also gives us dull actors, silly dialogue and a story whose main purpose seems to be to deliver a poorly developed rant against new media. So, if you see it on Netflix (or whatever) check it out. But, don't expect another Night, Dawn or even Day.

Trailer Time!

Guardians Of The Galaxy - Villains Get Some Poster Love

Okay, these are just awesome, particularly Karen Gillan as a hot-ass blue chick...instead of the hot-ass ginger she is in real life. Click on images to make 'em big. Do it!

Ronan the Accuser, Kree bad guy with a hammer. Everybody gets a hammer these days.

Nebula, hot homicidal blue chick. She can kick my ass whenever she wants.

Some dude named Korath. Reminds me a little of Lobot (see below).

Lobot...Korath's cousin? Or just a bald guy with unfashionable brain implants? You decide.

Oh, and here's Karen Gillan looking substantially less blue. And you're welcome.

Battle Of The Five Armies...Yawn...

With Comic-Con coming starting up next week (I want to be there...sad me) everyone is dumping images, plot points, story-lines, etc for upcoming movies, TV shows, comics...if it's genre media, there's new stuff being flung at the geek masses.

The image below is from Peter Jackson's third Hobbit film, The Battle of Five Armies. But, really, who cares? The last movie was so bad, so boring, a cinematic slog, that I have zero interest in seeing the next one. Jackson has made some awesome movies; but the Hobbit films are exercises in bloated self-indulgence. What her really needs is an editor or producer or someone who can tell him "Peter, this whole sequence is dull and dumb; cut it." But, apparently this doesn't happen. Of course, Smaug made almost a billion dollars world-wide so he must being doing something that people like, right?

Anyway, image of Gandalf and some other greasy haired bearded guy below. Enjoy.

TV Daredevil Gets A Karen Page

Will she wear this in Daredevil? Please please please...

Great news on the TV front. Netflix, which is developing a number of Marvel properties including Daredevil, has announced it is casting True Blood's Deborah Ann Woll as DD's love interest Karen Page. In addition to being insanely hot, Wolf is also a good actor; she has been one of the few bright spots as True blood goes off the rails in its final seasons. I was looking forward to the Netflix Marvel series before; now, I can't wait to see them. Hurry up, Netflix! Oh, and don;t forget a shower scene or two with Deborah. You can never be too clean, right?

Happy Trailers - Zombie-A-Thon Edition - Night Of The Living Dead (1968)

I love trailers. I have entire disks I've made of film trailers. Whenever I do a movie night, I subject my guests to as many of them as I think they will stand before they start throwing beer bottles at me. So, I'm going to start a new feature on the site, Happy Trailers. Not only will I post the trailer, I'll give a little review of it. Creating a good trailer is an art form in its own right. You want to entice the audience without giving too much of the story away or showing too much of the money scenes. On the other hand, if you have a bad movie, you have 90 seconds to try to make it look good.

The trailer for Night of the Living Dead does a good job of letting you know what you're going to see. There's some violence, lot's of screaming, some gore (the head, stripped of flesh is prominent in the trailer even though it is on-screen in the film for a about two seconds) and enough voice-over exposition to let you know what the film is about. There are no character scenes, no in-film dialogue, nothing to indicate that the movie will ever slow down. And, for the most part, that's true. Romero keeps his movie moving at a nice pace, something the trailer accurately reflects. And, of course, there is no hint of the ending. Since the ending is still disturbing almost 50 years after the film was released, not hinting at it was a good call. Based on this trailer, I'd want to see the movie.

Another Neat Plot Point For Age Of Ultron

Ultron's creator will be...Tony Stark! In the comics, the creator of Ultron is Henry Pym aka Ant Man aka Giant Man aka Yellow Jacket aka...so many superhero identities. Just pick one.

Since this character has not been introduced in the Marvel Cinematic Universe yet and since movie-Stark is the tech guy, this is a good idea. Having Tony develop the AI to help the Avengers cope with threats in the post-SHIELD world makes sense. We'll have to see why Ultron goes all genocidal. Maybe he's like Bender and it's just part of his charming personality.

Zombie-A-Thon #6 - Resident Evil: Apocalypse (2004) - With Spawnpoint Spoilers

Resident Evil movies are schlock. They are background noise. They are hot chicks kicking monster ass and lots of gunfire. They are heaving mounds of cliches and stereotypes, bad writing and terrible acting.

I do love them so. I'm going to skip the first one - seen it too many times - and head into Resident Evil: Apocalypse in which undead, flesh-eating freaks learn to love again.

Synopsis

Set immediately after the first film, Apocalypse follows a small group of survivors as they try to escape zombie infested Raccoon City. Introduced to the series are Jill Valentine (uber-hottie Sienna Guillory), Carlos Olivera (Oded Fehr who was pretty good in The Mummy and The Mummy Returns) and Mike Epps as LJ Wade. There are some other people...but we do need cannon fodder, right?

When the film starts, the city is already being overrun. The police are overwhelmed and the citizens are try to flee through checkpoints set up by the Umbrella Corporation, makers of fine viral apocalypses. The local Umbrella head honcho sees the incident as a great place to test two projects related to the T-virus (the zombie disease). Project Alice (Milla Jovovich as a super-powered killing machine and survivor of the first film, Alice) and Project Nemesis, a massive mutant with flesh stapled over his eyes (why?) and a Gatling gun. Valentine is a Raccoon City cop, Olivera an Umbrella commando stuck in the city with a dwindling squad of soldiers and LJ is the "urban" comic relief. Disposable characters include Sandrine Holt as wannabe ace report Terri Morales, Jared Harris as Umbrella sci-guy Charles Ashford and Sophie Vavasseur as his little daughter, Angela Ashford. The last character is important because she is left in the city during the evacuation and her father contacts our motley collection heroes and survivors and offers them a deal; find his daughter and he can get them out of the doomed city.

Zombie mayhem ensues, super-Milla kicks all kinds of butt, cannon fodder gets...foddered...mutant monster mayhem whittles down our plucky band, the bad guys eventually get theirs and the city is nuked. Boom.

Analysis

A Licker. Isn't he cute?

I'm not sure how you really review a film like this. The cast isn't very good; but, given the roles as written, even Olivier would have trouble bringing them to life. Milla makes a serviceable action heroine; if nothing else, she looks good in battle fashion garb and seems to be enjoying herself. The plot is so basic that it's hard to pick apart. Sure, physics are ignored, coincidence trumps logic, questions like "why is a corporation handling this and not the US Army?" aren't even asked...well, I guess there is a lot to pick at; but, you are essentially working with video game logic here. Crawl through a level, shoot the mooks, find the boss, kill it, repeat until you get to the big boss at the end of the game. Given that the movie series is based on a video game series, this is to be expected.

Jill Valentine dressed for the end of the world.

There are some neat scenes. Milla blowing up a mutant monster with a flying motorcycle in a church is one. The death of Morales at the hands and teeth of a pack of hungry zombie school kids is also pretty disturbing. There are many that don't work as well: random slow-motion shots, a graveyard with cinematic fog (as in, there's only fog in the cemetery because it looks "scarey"), ill-advised - and not funny - comic relief from the LJ. A fire blanket protects a wearer from a massive explosion. And so on.

While director Alexander Witt is no Gareth Evans (The Raid) he's pretty good at filming action sequences. Since the movie is, basically, nothing but action scenes, this is a good thing. He would later go on to do a lot of second unit work on films like Casino Royale and X-Men: First Class. Sound effects are thunderous - lots of explosions and gunshots, with a heavy metal/bombastic action score filling blasting through most of the film. Dialogue is a mix of tough guy cliches and the kind of exposition you'd find in a video game cut-scene. While the make-up effects are pretty good, the CGI for the Lickers is cartoonish and there is surprising lack of blood in the film. While not as gore free as, say, World War Z you see a lot more graphic violence in an average episode of The Walking Dead. While gore doesn't make a movie, it's absence in a zombie gunfest is noticeable.

Verdict

This is the kind of movie that, if it had been released in 1974 instead of 2004, would've been great to see at a drive-in, albeit with the inclusion of a shower scene. Drive-in movies always need a shower scene. It's loud and dumb, but mostly fun. Check it out.

Here is the trailer.

Crack The Spine: A Semi-Regular Book Review - Detroit: An American Autopsy

I read a lot of books. So, why not share my opinions with the world on what I think you should read. Because, I'm generous that way.

First up, Detroit: An American Autopsy (click to buy from Amazon) by Charlie LeDuff. The book looks at the decline of Detroit, focusing on the lives of a number of citizens, police and firemen, government officials (mostly in the role of villains) and the author's family. It is pretty good. I like the author's style, very engaging and informative, reflecting his years in print media. I also found his stories of both corruption and courage to be fascinating. Finally, as a Detroit native who witnessed some of the events that led to the current state of the city, there was a personal angle that I have to acknowledge.

However, the book does have a few failings, the most glaring the failure to fully realize either the title ("an autopsy") or one of the premises, that Detroit's fate is potentially that of America. On the first point, "autopsy" to me implies a more systematic exploration of the trends and decisions that led to the present day. While the author does include some background on the city's history, more time is spent writing about family events and anecdotal tales of corruption and people trying their best to get by. A better title would have been "Detroit: A Viewing" or "Detroit: A Wake."

As for the second, more serious thematic failing, the author doesn't do a good job of synching up the problems in Detroit with those of the country. The most obvious one - the economic shifts of the last 40 years and the decline in manufacturing employment - is touched on; but is also one that has been gone over so many times that it seems like rote repetition. The more provocative one - trying to tie the corruption in the city government to a larger lose of confidence in the America system - is not well-developed and, in fact, the author offers counter-indications of this. I'm thinking specifically of the funeral of a fireman, in which the Detroit firemen show up in their shabby gear and the men from surrounding suburbs and other cities show up in new gear. This would seem to indicate "the system" is working elsewhere, just not Detroit. I think the case could be made that Detroit is a "canary in the coal mine" for America; I just don't think the author makes it.

Even with those criticisms, I still enjoyed the book...if one can actually be said to enjoy a book that is a record of the death rattle of a city.

Ultron Gets A Face

Entertainment Weekly has some new images from Avengers: Age of Ultron (click here). They also have an image of everyone's favorite genocidal robot on the cover of this week's issue. Here it is:

Not bad. Here are a couple of images of Ultron from over the years.

And, finally, Ultron taking the form of Janet Van Dyne aka The Wasp...using Tony Stark's body and Iron Man armor as raw material. Um...ewww. Well, at least she has nice robot boobies.

Anyway, Ultron looks pretty sweet, at least as far as the design is concerned.

Marvel Announces Female Thor

The new Thor.

Ah, Loki, you sexy minx.

Marvel announced that Thor is undergoing a sex change. Well, not exactly. However, there will be a new Thor and she is...well, a she. Throughout Thor's long comic book history, there have been other wielders of Mjolnir, Thor's magic hammer. And, the Norse gods have had sex changes before. Remember hot female Loki (which has led to some great cosplay)? Changing who wields the hammer and who bears the title 'Thor' can work. The biggest danger is that this is just a stunt. The current Thor is still going to be around, using some other magic beat-down stick. Will this just be an excuse for Marvel to "shake things up" only to back off later and Dude Thor take back his hammer?

Current Thor writer Jason Aaron had this to say about the new character, “This is not She-Thor. This is not Lady Thor. This is not Thorita. This is THOR. This is the Thor of the Marvel Universe.” Okay, that seems pretty clear. However, Marvel did something like this recently with Spider-Man, when they had the mind of Doctor Octopus take over Peter Parker's body, becoming the Superior Spider-Man. It was a bad idea to begin with, one that was recently reversed. And we all know what happens when superheroes "die" only to be resurrected later (Jena Grey, Superman, Captain America, etc.). However, as long as the change leads to interesting stories, then I'm all for it.

That's the real trick, isn't it; to write compelling stories. To create characters who you can get invested in. to not just make a change for the sake of change. When Steve Rogers (Captain America) was killed at the end of the 'Civil War' no one thought it would be permanent. And, amazingly enough...it wasn't. Characters can be reintroduced successfully; Ed Brubaker's "Resurrection" off Bucky Barnes is a great example of this. However, a storyline that lead to a major character death or some other significant change (like a new, female Thor...or just a new permanent Thor, period) have the odor of a gimmick about them.

My fave Lady Loki cosplay.

On a side note, could this have repercussions in Marvel's cinematic universe? Eventually, the current crop of actors will move on to other things. We may be seeing a new Iron Man soon, if Robert Downing decides to eventually reject the dump trucks of money that Marvel/Disney is backing up to his lawn. Could we eventually see a chick Thor on the big screen? And if so, who'd make a good Thorette? Maybe Jaimie Alexander could trade her sword for a hammer. Check back later for a few heavily Photoshopped ideas!

New Fantastic Four Movie Not Based On A Comic Story

The story going around Interwebs is that the new Fantastic Four movie won't have a story based on anything from the comics. Here is a few quotes from Kate Mara (Sue Storm aka The Invisible Woman);

I've never been a fan of comics, I've never actually read one. I was going to for this movie but the director said it wasn't necessary. Well, actually he told us that we shouldn't do it because the plot won't be based on any history of anything already published. So I chose to follow his instructions. The one fact is I am a fan of comic book movies, so it's very exciting to be part of a movie like this.

I think it a little odd that the director wouldn't want an actor to read some of the source material to get a feel for how the character has been presented, even if only to show how not to portray that character. The creative team on the new FF film is apparently doing everything they can to distance themselves from the comics. Which begs the question; why bother? Why not just make an original superhero movie? Call it The Terrific Tetralogy and do your own thing.

Of course, the reason is name recognition. It doesn't appear that anyone involved has much respect or interest in the source material. This is looking more and more like another Emmerich Godzilla; an adaptation that fails to understand what makes the source materiel popular and has an underlying contempt for it.

Of course, this may prove to be wrong. It may be that making a Fantastic Four movie which follows the comics in name only is the right way to go; but I have my doubts.

Source: Jo Blo

New Issue Of Far Horizons Out

Like zombies? If so, check out the all-new, all-zombie issue of the Far Horizons e-mag. This issue includes three stories by yours truly. Anyway, check the issue out for a lot of interesting and entertaining takes on the undead flesh-munchers.

American Horror Story Teaser

There's a teaser for the next season of American Horror Story (sub-titled Freak Show) out that is appropriately creepy. Love the series, love the concept and love the weirdness of the teaser. Check it out below.

Cinema Sins Does Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes

With the upcoming release of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, CinemaSins is checking out Rise of the Planet of the Apes. Final tally: 102.

Check it out.

Zombie-A-Thon #5 - Kolchak: The Night Stalker - The Zombie (Aired: September 20, 1974) - With Voodoo Spoilers

I love Kolchak: The Night Stalker. I first saw the series as kid and immediately identified with Darren McGavin's acerbic, stubborn, tough-minded but not very likeable reporter, Carl Kolchak. Introduced in 1972 in the TV movie The Night Stalker (followed by The Night Strangler in 1973) the series followed his adventures as he discovered the horrors that lurk in the shadows of modern America. Add to that a collection of quirky supporting characters, creative (if not always successful) takes on classic monsters and some clever scripts and you had a pretty neat show.

Of course, you also had some shoddy looking effects and you had to believe that Kolchak managed to find a new monster every week, one that he would have to stop, because the authorities were all either bumbling fools or dedicated to keeping the public from knowing just how strange the world really was.

Synopsis

Being a zombie may cause a severe skin rash.

Mob members are being killed in Chicago by having their spines snapped. Kolchak discovers a link between the dead men and a recently killed Haitian criminal. Turns out, the dead man's grandmother is a Voodoo priestess. She revived him to take revenge on the men who had a hand in his death. Kolchak becomes a target after he gets too close to the truth and has to fight the undead killing machine in an auto graveyard. Will our intrepid reporter prevail?

Analysis

This is one of the best Kolchak episodes. It features clever writing, good acting from the leads, as well as from the supporting cast (including Antonio Fargas and Scatman Crothers) and some creepy visuals. The makeup for the zombie is effective, particularly a scene during the climax, in which the zombie sits up, his full body make-up glistening wetly. The episode also features some of the show, with authorities who are willfully ignorant, a gritty urban vibe and a monster that is an interesting twist on a legendary creature.

Verdict

While not all episodes of Kolchak were great, this one is. Check it out.

Neat Star Wars Fan Flick

This is cool Star Wars fan film showing Tie fighters, Imperial Shuttles, AT-ATs, AT-STs, Stormtroopers, a Star Destroyer, A force field generator and even a partially-built Death Star all around Germany's Frankfurt International Airport. Cool stuff. Check it out.